A Flesh-Eating Virus Invades ‘Top Model’

Is it a flesh-eating virus or a less virulent skin disease? Tune in to tonight’s “America’s Next Top Model,” when MICHELLE wakes up with little burn-like circles on her face, and the rest of the girls freak out.

“I have no idea what it is,” Michelle explains to her fellow models, who go a bit over the top speculating behind Michelle’s back that the disfiguring marks could be a flesh-eating virus, the result of devil worship or self-mutilation.

And don’t miss next week’s episode, when wanna-be model LAKEISHA reveals that, every few weeks, she starts bleeding from her vagina.

As the girls speculate about whether the bleeding is caused by vagina-eating insect burrowed into her snatch, or the results of some sort of alien sex experiment, host Tyra Banks steps in.

“It’s called ‘menstruating’, sometimes known as your ‘period,’” Banks explained.

Lakeisha, overwhelmed with emotion, runs from the room. “I was told there would be no spelling!” she sobs as she leaves.

Will Lakeisha be able to learn to read soon enough to stop her vagina from disintegrating? Tune in next week to find out.